08 February 2012

Contemplations

I am thinking about it and trying to follow the path I described hereunder. However, I also started thinking about if anything goes, Godforbid, wrong with either one of my children. I think I would be truly torn to pieces and begging God to have me suffer from their disconnection from me instead of 'that'. And so.... I won't become the person I detest becoming. I will keep on loving them and feeling hurt because they don't love me back.

I just have to figure out a way to direct this hurt into a healthy and comfortable way of living. One that doesn't make me think of the end of the world straight away.

I know now it's not the end of the world. There still are things far worse than having your children not wanting to speak to you.

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